The system of Modesty & Chastity in Islam-

Importance of marriage and its stability:
Whereas Islam has made it a father’s responsibility to arrange, timely marriage of his son or daughter, the son or the daughter are also required to understand its importance and not to oppose any such proposal made by the father. It is the father’s responsibility to make a suitable selection of a match for his son or daughter. Among other things he should have his eyes on the moral and religious sectors of prospective candidates. A boy or a girl with good religious background is expected to prove loyal and such a marriage may be stable and without troubles. Allah has forbidden marriage of Muslim males with polytheistic females:
“Do not marry the polytheist until they have embraced Islam and become faithful.”
The Muslim scholars have explained in detail the importance of this embargo as laid down by Allah in the Holy Qur’an.Shaikh ul Hind. Maulana Mahmood ul Hassan Rahmatullah alaih writes: “Marriage is such an institution that a man and a woman get most close and near to each other. Their mutual love, their actions and speech, everything has an effect on the other party. If the wife or the husband is a non-Muslim polytheist, the effects of evil belief are bound to fall on the Muslim wife or husband who upholds monotheism. A prolonged association with a person of evil faith may’ change the heart of the other party and may land him in the Fire of Hell. As such, such marriage must be eschewed.” Shah Wali ullah Rahmatullah alaih of Delhi has also expressed similar views.
Apart from moral and religious draw-backs of marriage with non-Muslims, even from worldly point of view, the chances: of such a marriage being successful are rare. When thinking is not alike, faith and belief is not alike, married life cannot give love and loyalty to the parties and there can be chances of frequent bitterness and temperamental differences. There are fears of modesty of the two sides, being affected. As such, no Muslim should think of marrying a non-Muslim.

 

www.thejamiat.co.za

Can a man marry another wife just to have sex?

Q. Is it permissible for a man to marry a second and third wife only for the sake of fulfilling his sexual desires?

 

A. It is permissible for a man to marry another wife even if it is only for the sake of his sexual desires just as it is permissible to get married to one woman for the sake of sexual desire. All men marry primarily for this reason. The other aspects, e.g. procreation, caring for the women, etc., are by-products. Despite their fundamental importance, it is furthest from the minds of men when they marry. Only those with exceptionally high Taqwa have the other factors of altruism in mind.

Q. What kind of reward can a first wife expect for restraining from acting upon the dictates of one’s natural jealousy towards here husband’s other wives?

 

A. Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said:

“Verily, Allah has decreed for women (the reward of restraining) envy, and for men the reward of (fortitude) in Jihad. Therefore, the woman who adopts Sabr when her husband marries another woman will obtain the reward of a Shaheed (Martyr).”

The attitude of jealousy is deeply ingrained in the nafs of a woman. The idea of her husband taking a second wife is intolerable to her. In fact if she lacks proper knowledge of the Shariah, she destroys her Imaan with utterances and attitudes of kufr should her husband marry a second wife. Allah Ta’ala is the Creator of both man and woman. He understands the natures of His creation. By design has He created in woman an incorrigible degree of hasad (jealousy). This world is the abode of struggle and self-purification. There will be no opportunity for self-purification and moral reformation in the Hereafter or in Jannat. The only abode of purification in the Aakhirah is Jahannum (Hell-Fire). Allah Ta’ala has bestowed to us the wonderful opportunity of this brief earthly life for self-purification and reformation. This process requires constant and diligent struggle against the promptings and demands of the bestial nafs.

For women, Allah Ta’ala has ordained an easy way for the acquisition of the lofty ranks of shahaadat (martyrdom). She has to exercise Sabr, struggle and restrain her nafs by refusing to fulfil the dictates of her jealousy, especially when her husband takes another wife. While the generation of envy is natural, and for which there is no sin, giving vent to the demands of the evil tendency of hasad is not permitted. She is required to apply pressure on her nafs, restrain the dictates of the nafs and compel herself to accept the situation, and conceal the flames of hasad which will consume and ruin her if she submits to the envy. This is the way of martyrdom ordained by Allah Ta’ala for females. In fact, the Shariah has simplified the acquisition of martyrdom status for women. Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said:

“A woman attains the rank of martyrdom with her engrossment in her household activities.”

Can women masturbate themselves in Islam?

Masturbation

Q: If a girl masturbates about her future husband is it haraam? If yes then how could one repent?

A: This is impermissible. She should sincerely repent for this and refrain from this in the future.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.

مطلب في حكم الاستمناء بالكف (قوله: وكذا الاستمناء بالكف) أي في كونه لا يفسد لكن هذا إذا لم ينزل أما إذا أنزل فعليه القضاء كما سيصرح به وهو المختار كما يأتي لكن المتبادر من كلامه الإنزال بقرينة ما بعده فيكون على خلاف المختار (قوله: ولو خاف الزنى إلخ) الظاهر أنه غير قيد بل لو تعين الخلاص من الزنى به وجب؛ لأنه أخف وعبارة الفتح فإن غلبته الشهوة ففعل إرادة تسكينها به فالرجاء أن لا يعاقب اهـ زاد في معراج الدراية وعن أحمد والشافعي في القديم الترخص فيه وفي الجديد يحرم ويجوز أن يستمني بيد زوجته وخادمته اهـ وسيذكر الشارح في الحدود عن الجوهرة أنه يكره ولعل المراد به كراهة التنزيه فلا ينافي قول المعراج يجوز تأمل وفي السراج إن أراد بذلك تسكين الشهوة المفرطة الشاغلة للقلب وكان عزبا لا زوجة له ولا أمة أو كان إلا أنه لا يقدر على الوصول إليها لعذر قال أبو الليث أرجو أن لا وبال عليه وأما إذا فعله لاستجلاب الشهوة فهو آثم اهـ. بقي هنا شيء وهو أن علة الإثم هل هي كون ذلك استمتاعا بالجزء كما يفيده الحديث وتقييدهم كونه بالكف ويلحق به ما لو أدخل ذكره بين فخذيه مثلا حتى أمنى، أم هي سفح الماء وتهييج الشهوة في غير محلها بغير عذر كما يفيده قوله وأما إذا فعله لاستجلاب الشهوة إلخ؟ لم أر من صرح بشيء من ذلك والظاهر الأخير؛ لأن فعله بيد زوجته ونحوها فيه سفح الماء لكن بالاستمتاع بجزء مباح كما لو أنزل بتفخيذ أو تبطين بخلاف ما إذا كان بكفه ونحوه وعلى هذا فلو أدخل ذكره في حائط أو نحوه حتى أمنى أو استمنى بكفه بحائل يمنع الحرارة يأثم أيضا ويدل أيضا على ما قلنا ما في الزيلعي حيث استدل على عدم حله بالكف بقوله تعالى {والذين هم لفروجهم حافظون} [المؤمنون: 5] الآية وقال فلم يبح الاستمتاع إلا بهما أي بالزوجة والأمة اهـ فأفاد عدم حل الاستمتاع أي قضاء الشهوة بغيرهما هذا ما ظهر لي والله سبحانه أعلم. (رد المحتار 2/399)

Answered by:

Mufti Zakaria Makada

Checked & Approved:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

Prohibiting marriage below 18 is unislamic

ISLAMABAD- The Council of Islamic Ideology (CII) ruled today that Pakistani laws prohibiting marriage of underage children are un-Islamic. At the end of its two-day session today, the CII said there is no minimum age of marriage according to Islam.

“Islam does not forbid marriage of young children,” the council said. “However, the consummation of marriage is only allowed when both husband and wife have reached puberty.”

The CII’s ruling comes a day after its chairman Maulana Mohammad Khan Sheerani said laws regarding second marriage of a man in the presence of a first wife were against religious principles. “Sharia allows men to have more than one wife and we demanded that the government should amend the law,” he told reporters after a CII meeting.

Pakistani law requires a man to have written approval from his existing wife or wives for another marriage. Sheerani urged the government to formulate Sharia-compliant laws related to marriage, divorce, adulthood and ‘will’. According to the Constitution of Pakistan, the CII is a recommendatory body that advises the parliament in the law-making process, but cannot enact laws on its own.

henna parties, henna designs are not permissible

mujlisul.ulama@gmail.com	12:25 PM (4 hours ago)
to me

ASSALAMU ALAIKUM

8 Rabiul Awwal 1435 (10 January 2014)

Umm Muhammad

Your e-mail dated 9 January 2014 refers.

THE ERRORS IN THE HENNA ARTICLE

(1) There is no Shar’i obligation to cover the palms of the hand if henna has been applied to them. The writer of the article has erred in claiming that the palms, if stained with henna should be covered.

(2) The weird henna designs which Muslim women have adopted in recent years is in emulation of Hindus or some other kuffaar cults. This is not permissible. Henna should be applied without adoption of the weird, ugly designs.

(3) Regardless of cultural styles to a ‘geopolitical’ area, any style which is in conflict with any tenet of Islam, will be impermissible. The style of eating and dressing of a community must necessarily be changed by Muslims to conform to an Islamic style. The

(4) The henna nights and parties are not permissible. Such wasteful, stupid customs are not for Muslims.

Was-salaam

A.S. Desai

For

Mujlisul Ulama of S.A.

Assalaamu respected Hadhrat.

 Below is the answer of a brother and my questions on the bottom of the page. Could you please give me an detailed advice on the errors of his reply to my question.

I understood that henna designs on any part of the skin, especially at wedding functions, eid are  bidat and copying the kuffar in making temporary tatoos and tatoo designs and no hadith or something ever showed that the body of a women can be adorned that way and give parties.

Wa salaam umm mhammad

Waleykum Salam respected sister

I apologize for my late reply.

To the best of my knowledge, there is no problem with henna designs by women, unless there are some specific religious symbols like the christian cross or so on. Henna is staining and not permanent tattooing or engraving. Muslim women have used henna all throughout history. MAybe the kuffar have their own rituals and designs, but this does not undo our own culture. Please also note that there is difference between something being a geographical area’s general culture common to all people, and something being a specific ritual of the kuffaar.

Please note that somethings are cultural to a geopolitical area, like eating styles and dressing styles

If a woman has applied henna to her hands or feet, she should cover them from ghayr mahram men, as Allah commands believing women to guard their beautification. If she does not apply, she can keep her palms and feet blow the ankles open according to the Hanafi madhhab.

Furthermore, the henna must be applied to a sister by Muslim women and not men or kafir women.

Men can use henna on the body as a treatment if it genuinely and truly helps a medical condition, as in such a case it would be deemed medication or ointment. Men can also (and should if they can) dye their beards and head hairs with henna, this is mustahab and proven from books of hadiith.

The Shariah states that mahr must be paid at the time of marriage, but it is acceptable to defer (delay) it.

For any detailed discussions on mahr, I would advise you to please consult a qualified Sunni mufti.

Single sisters can beautify themselves at homes or in front of other women, specially those older women who would be looking for prospective brides for their sons. The rule is that ghayr mahram should not see a sister’s beautification.

Any gifts exchanged by mutual goodwill without any intention to copy the kuffaar are fine. Imitating the kuffaar and deeming it mandatory for the bride’s family to give gifts to the grooms family is a very bad practice in these times.

There is nothing wrong with a sister having her female Muslim friends over for a party before the wedding, to sing songs, make merry, apply henna etc. henna nights are popular all over the Muslim world. But in such cases, the men should not be present, or else everyone incurs sin. Also kafir women should not be invited to any place where the Muslim sisters uncover their hijabs.

I don’t have the specific hadith references with me right now, but the above is what I learnt from my teachers and betters.

Please double check any specific queries with a qualified mufti of the Ahlus Sunnah.

Allah knows best. May Allah grant us success.

———————————————————————–

Asslaamu alykum respected brother.

I do have a question.

Here in Pakistan many customs arenot Islamic and strill deep rooted and forth carried by the hindu culture and ancestors. I. e. The mehr is not given at the time of meher, but ate the time of divorce, and affordable sums are requested as mehr to show status .
And just as hindu culture. And demands are made by the grooms family and offers are made by the brides family to the groom and mother in low and female relatives.. Just as in the hindu culture.

Also the wedding ceremony and especially the henna designs on the arms, hands, legs, feet , etc, have been carried on from hindu culture and other pagan cultures to mark their idol worship ( i.e tha maja, certain african tribes, chinese body painting..) and beautification and so show off of the body.

Now her in Pakistan no wedding ceremony, which is marked by many bidat and haraam practices, and no
Eid is seen as complete and correct without the appliance of henna designs.

The female satr, like arms, legs, other parts, are uncovered and females run about without covering it up as it has to dry or the design which is very expensive is getting messed up. If they ever do cover up a bit here.

Only few know that henna designs resembles the tattoo making, meaning making pictures and designs any kind on any part of the body for beautification and religious ritual which are not Islamic.

Everybody cites asit is sunnat to use henna.
.But how? Like this and that males put in on their hands too? And certain medical conditions and the weather her do validate certain uses for both sexes. Right?

Females only on their nails and pamls without any design and for no special purpose and henna in the hair can be used only after marriage as it is meant for beautification and beautification is only inside the home for the husband.

It is the handwriting of iblees the accursed to tattoo permanent or temporary, with color like henna or tatoo paint the body and against hayaaa….etc.

Now to carry on such baseless bidat practices is it not also proudly propagating the kufr culture instead of proudly and stern rejecting it and propagating the haqq?

Is there any hadith or sunnat which can explain the layman, women the use of henna according to sex, and age and occasion backed by shariah?

Jazakallh. please forgive that i reply on the post but i do not know where to ask a question here

Wa sllaam

mujlisul.ulama@gmail.com	12:25 PM (4 hours ago)
to me

ASSALAMU ALAIKUM

8 Rabiul Awwal 1435 (10 January 2014)

Umm Muhammad

Your e-mail dated 9 January 2014 refers.

THE ERRORS IN THE HENNA ARTICLE

(1) There is no Shar’i obligation to cover the palms of the hand if henna has been applied to them. The writer of the article has erred in claiming that the palms, if stained with henna should be covered.

(2) The weird henna designs which Muslim women have adopted in recent years is in emulation of Hindus or some other kuffaar cults. This is not permissible. Henna should be applied without adoption of the weird, ugly designs.

(3) Regardless of cultural styles to a ‘geopolitical’ area, any style which is in conflict with any tenet of Islam, will be impermissible. The style of eating and dressing of a community must necessarily be changed by Muslims to conform to an Islamic style. The

(4) The henna nights and parties are not permissible. Such wasteful, stupid customs are not for Muslims.

Was-salaam

A.S. Desai

For

Mujlisul Ulama of S.A.

THE SHARIAH’S COMMENT ON THE RULING OF THE WESTERN CAPE HIGH COURT

Assalamu alaikum

 

20 Zil Hajj 1434

26 October 2013

THE SHARIAH’S COMMENT ON THE RULING OF THE WESTERN CAPE HIGH COURT

In a press report on the Western Cape High Court’s ruling  on 25 October 2013, pertaining to the legal recognition of  a Muslim woman’s Islamic marriage, the following inaccuracy  appears:

“The husband subsequently  annulled  the marriage under Islamic rite, but the couple later resumed  sexual relations.

According to the tenets of Islam, this meant that the annulment, called Talaq, was no longer valid.”

 

This statement is grossly incorrect because:

• According to the Shariah, a husband has no power of annulling his Nikah (Islamic Marriage).
• Sexual relations do not invalidate an Annulment
• Sexual relations with the woman after a valid Islamic Annulment is Zina (adultery).

The hogwash in the report is due to the ignorance of the reporter or compiler of the report. The likely scenario was that the husband had issued oneTalaq Raj’i (Revocable Divorce). When such a divorce is issued, the husband retains the right of reconciling with his wife. In this process of reconciliation, the  wife to whom a Talaaq Raj’i  was administered has no say and no option. It is a unilateral  process. The husband has the Islamic right to unilaterally  take back his wife prior to the expiry of a period called the Iddat.

If the husband invokes his right of reconciling, the Talaaq Raj’i which he had issued is not invalidated. It remains in suspense  for lifetime. A man has the right to issue three Talaaqs. After administering one Talaaq, he still has the right to issue two more Talaaq.

According to the Shariah, sexual relations after administration of a Talaaq Raj’i  is in effect  reconciliation which is a revocation (Raj’at) of the Talaaq. It is not the invalidation of the Talaaq. The Talaaq remains valid lifelong.

Annulment means Faskh. Faskh is not Talaaq. An annulment is valid in the Shariah only if decreed by an Islamic court or by an Islamic Committee/Tribunal empowered to issue such a decree. To secure an annulment, it is necessary for the wife to lodge an application. Only after  the due Shar’i  process has followed its course will the application be granted or rejected. There is no certitude  that the wife’s application for Faskh will be granted.

The press report also mentions:  “The man’s adult son from a prior marriage then forced the woman out of their home.”  If  the husband had revoked the Talaaq Raj’i – and this appears to be the case from the MJC’s letter stating the  subsistence of the Nikah – the woman had the full right to remain in the marital home. According to the Shariah, occupying the marital home during the Iddat is mandatory. The son had no Islamic legal right of expelling his stepmother from the marital home. Furthermore, morally too, in terms of Islam, the son had no right of expelling his stepmother from the marital home.

In addition, if the marital home is the property of the deceased husband, then the woman had inherited her share in the property and in all the assets of her husband. She  will share equally with her co-wife, the first wife of her husband.

Assuming that the man had not revoked  the Talaaq thereby terminating the Nikah, then too, the son had no right Islamically speaking, to evict his stepmother from the house. A stepmother according to the Shariah has similar rights as one’s mother. The same respect, dignity, concern and maintenance which the Shariah  has ordained for one’s biological mother, accrue for the stepmother as well.

The press report further adds: “The court found there had been considerable delays in the promulgation of the Muslim marriages bill, dealing with the legal intricacies of such marriages.” For the edification of the court, it should be mentioned that the so-called ‘Muslim’ Marriages Bill provides no solution for  ‘such’ marriages. The MMB is a concoction of anomalies presented  deceptively under Islamic guise. It provides no solution for the type of scenario which the Western Cape High Court had to deal with. If the marriage of the woman was indeed Islamically valid at the time of the  death of the man, then the court’s ruling in so far as the legality of the marriage is concerned is correct. On the other hand, if the Nikah had already ended in terms of the Shariah, then the ruling of the court is catastrophic because:

1.       The ruling  confers legality to a non-existent marriage thereby conferring the status of wifehood to a strange woman.

2.       The rights of inheritance are conferred on a person who is Islamically not an heir of the deceased. The consequence is usurpation of  the rights and wealth of others.

The only solution for matrimonial disputes of Muslims is for them to submit to the rulings  of the Ulama. There is absolutely no other valid and viable solution. The hybrid MMB concoction simply entrenches kufr which ignorant Muslims will believe is the Law of the Shariah.

Reproduced originally from: UUCSA (2013)

 

Saudis destruction of Sahria and Islam-nikah below 18 haraam despite parental consent!

 

Saudi Arabia

New law to set marital age

of consent at 18

Shoura Council would soon discuss the law

16 December 2013

RIYADH — A long-awaited personal affairs law that regulates family relationships and decides the rights of women and children will include an article setting the minimum age of marital consent at 18, Al-Hayat newspaper reported Sunday.

Legal sources said under the new law, a girl under this age will not be allowed to marry without a court decision even if her male guardian has given his consent.

They said the Shoura Council would soon discuss the law before it is sent to the Council of Ministers for final approval.

The law will be based on the 282-item Muscat Document on personal affairs adopted by the GCC ministers of justice in 1998.

The sources said the law, which will be issued in the coming few weeks, includes chapters on marriage, separation between husbands and wives, maturity of men and women and inheritance.

The new law aims to achieve parity between men and women in all aspects of life.

The sources said the law would cancel the right of guardianship for men over women except in marriages, where Islamic Shariah gives them this right.

They said the wife could ask to include a stipulation in the marriage contract indicating her right to divorce if the husband marries another woman and she has the right to stay in the marital home if a divorce between them has not been made final.

According to the sources, the new law has described the relationship between married couples to be a partnership, not qiwamah (supremacy of men over women) as it used to be.

http://www.saudigazette.com.sa/index…20131216189654

 

 

THE BEGINNING OF MAN

 

29 Shawwaal 1434 – 6 September 2013

Q.     I am plagued by severe doubts about the beginning of mankind. How is it possible to believe that besides Adam and Hawwa there were no other humans? If they were the only human beings, who was the wife of his first son and husband for his first daughter?

A.     It suffices to know that Allah Ta’ala created Aadam and Hawwaa (alayhis salaam) and that they were the first of the human race to appear on earth. It is incumbent to accept and believe this much. Denial of this fact is kufr. Thereafter in which manner Allah Ta’ala spread out people on earth does not matter. The fact remains that people are existing and the only Creator is Allah Ta’ala.

However, we shall endeavour to answer your doubts in this regard. The first children to be born to Aadam (alayhis salaam) were a set of twins (one male and one female). The male’s name was Qaabeel and the female’s name Qaleemah. Thereafter sets of twins were born in rapid succession by the permission and power of Allah Ta’ala. Aadam (alayhis salaam) had a total of 20 sets of twins, each set having a male and a female. The last of them was Abdul Mugheeth and his sister Ummul Mugheeth. The second son of Aadam (alayhis salaam) was Haabeel and the third son was Sheeth (alayhis salaam). By the time Aadam (alayhis salaam) died there were 400,000 people on earth. The sons and daughters of Aadam (alayhis salaam) were blessed with numerous children and each family reproduced in quick succession. Nabi Aadam’s age was approximately 1,000 years.

Many names of the children of Aadam (alayhis salaam) appear in the Tauraah.

In order to start the process of procreation, Allah Ta’ala, in the beginning permitted marriage between the sons and daughters of Aadam (alayhis salaam). However, in that first system of marriage, the female and male of the same set of twins could not marry each other. The male of one set of twins married the female of another set of twins. After a while when a sufficient number of families was established in this way, Allah Ta’ala prohibited this system of marriage.

When Nabi Nooh (alayhis salaam) embarked on the ship during the great flood, there were approximately 70 people on board. The question of how mankind again started after the Flood, therefore should not pose any riddle. Among these persons were the three sons of Nooh (alayhis salaam). Saam was the progenitor of the Arab or Semitic race; Haam was the father of Habash or the African race and Yaafith was the Father of Unaan-e-Awwal or the Greeks. These sons spread out into different parts of the world. Each of these sons had three sons who also spread out.

This is an outline of the development and spread of mankind on earth.

With regard to the great Flood, one reliable view is that all people inhabiting the world at that time were not destroyed. Only the people of a particular region were destroyed.

According to the Qur’aan, Allah Ta’ala had decreed the year to have twelve months from the very beginning of Aadam’s time. While we have not yet seen any narrations on the names of the days and months, it will be safe to presume that these names were decreed by Allah Ta’ala. Aadam (alayhis salaam) was the most perfect and most intelligent and knowledgeable man. He appeared on earth in the most perfect state. He was not an ignorant ‘cave-man’. He was instructed in all worldly affairs, including farming, preparing food, sewing garments, etc. by Jibraeel (alayhis salaam). Thus all subsequent developments in every field of life have their origins in the Ta’leem of Nabi Aadam (alayhis salaam).

We advise that you increase your Thikr of Allah Ta’ala. Recite the Thikr of La ilaha illallaahu constantly and in abundance. Insha’Allah, your heart will open up and you will understand that these issues pertaining to the distant past history of mankind are irrelevant for the purpose of gaining nearness to Allah Ta’ala. Precisely for this reason does the Qur’aan not concern itself with the details of historical events.

May Allah Ta’ala guide you and ourselves..

 

Burden of marriage on the father

The system of Modesty & Chastity in Islam

Burden of marriage on the father

The attainment of young age by sons and daughters increases the responsibility of parents, particularly the fathers, to arrange marriage for them. Besides being shy and modest, the young man and woman do not have the material-means to defray expenses of marriage. As such, the Holy Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wasallam gave suitable distinction:

“When a man is blessed with a child, let him give his child a good name. He should bring him up on sound moral grounds and, when attains young age, the father must get him married. If the father fails to marry his son and he gets involved in any sin, the father will be held responsible for it.” (Mishkat)

 

Another Hadeeth is particularly about the daughter: “It is recorded in the Torah that, if a man’s daughter reaches the age of twelve years and he does not get her married, any moral lapse or sin committed by the girl will be the liability of her father.” (Mishkat).

Jamiat Gauteng

 

Protection of Modesty and Chastity and the Institution of Marriage in Islam:

 

All well-wishers of the human race and all national thinkers have appreciated that wide-spread adultery and rape are a scourge for humanity. The physical, social and moral corruption arising from this fatal addiction has forced thinkers and national leaders in the world to evolve some sort of legal code to put a stop to the recurring human troubles and social problems.

Islam has given to humanity a system of moral laws which are based on human psychology and which meticulously avoid the two extremes. Neither Celibacy nor free intercourse are permissible in Islam. It has adopted golden means and the Islamic teachings encourage the institution of marriage to such an extent that two, three or four wives have been made permissible. Sexual urge is the weakest point of any human being, male or female. Its satisfaction must be sought by lawful means which involve heavy responsibilities. The Holy Quran says:

“And get those married who are without a spouse among your slaves and maid servants.” (5-24: V:32)

Marriage of all such persons who are able-bodied and have supporting capacity, has been made almost compulsory. The responsibility devolves on the heads of families and on the nation as a whole.

Marriage has been described in Islamic jurisprudence as an obligation amounting almost to a duty. A large number of Traditions of the Holy Prophet Sallallahu alaihi wasallam emphasise timely marriage of boys and girls and servants and maid servants so that the social order remains free from corruption of free intercourse and the evils concomitant upon it. The Holy Prophet Sallallahu alaihi wasallam advised the young men: “0 group of young men! Whoso among you has full sexual power, let him (at once) court a marriage, because marriage alone can guard your sight and your private organs.”

 

Adultery, the worst tyranny on earth:

 

 

Out of all human follies adultery and rape are the worst human acts which perpetrate injustice and tyranny on the human individuals as well as the society at large. Prophet Joseph who was a model of decency, gentleness and knowledge was put in a trial to save his modesty. Divine decree passed him through different circumstances both difficult and trying. He was brought in the house of Aziz, a Minister of Egypt. When he attained manhood, the wife of Aziz was strongly drawn towards his youthful beauty. On a day, when her husband was away, she apparelled herself in gold and light and presented herself as a perfect bride to seduce Prophet Joseph and fall in illicit relationship wither. The Holy Qur’an stated:

 

“The woman in whose house he stayed, she seduced him and closed all the doors of the house and called upon (shamelessly) to enter upon her modesty.”(S.12: V: 23}

 

But Prophet Joseph refused and said:

 

“I seek the protection of Allah! (against your evil design) He (your husband) has been so kind to me and (I cannot ignore his rights) No unjust oppressors will earn salvation.” (S-12: V.23)

 

i) Adultery and rape is the root of all oppression and social injustice. Human character and human deeds are soiled and spoiled by lewdness and indecency. There is often wastage of wealth and at times there is also blood-shed. Normal health of indulgents is lost and sexual diseases often afflict such persons. Lewdness, indecency,” cheating, selfishness, and servitudes to casual desires, waywardness in thinking and spiritual backwardness are some of the concomitants of adultery and rape.

 

ii) Adultery also works havoc to a noble family whose reputation suffers an irreparable loss. Infamy begins to be attached to such a family and the general good character of the new generation suffers a severe setback.

 

iii) A noble-hearted woman who is naturally shrouded by feeling of shame and modesty is made to work against her own psychology. The evil act of rape transforms the human character of a woman. Her mental horizon becomes polluted and a time comes when she has said good bye to all good values of womanhood. The profession of prostitute is an outcome of men who have worked hard for the spread of indecency and lewdness in a good society. A good woman, when allowed and depend into sinful activity, gradually loses her feminine sense of honour and takes to a life of profligacy.

 

iv) There are cases when a woman breed, when forced into rape, prefers• death to life and commits suicide.

 

v) In the case of a married woman, the act of rape perpetrated upon her amounts to tyranny of the worst order.

 

vi) Adultery and rape are acts of mistrust perpetrated upon the new unborn generations. A bastard child has no personal fault put a Pandora’s Box of evils and deprivations are opened upon him. His misfortune deprives him of his normal growth and normal moral and spiritual development. Neither his body nor his soul can aspen to live true human life. This injustice has been also by the devilish man who has committed adultery resulting in his birth.

 

The Prophetic mind of Prophet Joseph understood the depth of events involved in the act of rape. He therefore spoke out his mind that a prison cell was far better than the heinous crime to which the profligate women of Egypt were inviting him

 

 

 

 

Merits of a Good woman include life of Prosperity:

 

What a lofty tribute has been paid to the female sex by the Great Prophet of Islam Sallallahu alaihi wasallam when he said:

“Among the things of this world my mind has been inclined to have love for women and perfumes; (but) my coolness of eyes lies in praying to Allah.” Allah, the Exalted, has, as though by way of incentive, given promise of prosperity on getting married. He has said:

”’If they (the persons courting marriage) are destitutes, Allah will grant them prosperity through His bounties and blessings. Allah is very generous and full of knowledge.” (S-24: V: 32)

Human weakness has always been to looks to the means of livelihood which are not always satisfactory. For tear of poverty and inability to defray expenses of married life, most people give up the idea of marriage and try to live a life of celibacy. But Allah, the Exalted, teaches man to place his reliance on His bounty and his generous sustenance. He says:

“Allah grants sustenance from sources which are beyond the imagination of man.” (S-65: V: 3)

“He grants sustenance for you and to those who depend on you.” (S-6: V: 151)

Fear of livelihood should not stand in the way of marriage of a youngman. This is a blessing of Islam that its carries the mind of man above the world of cause and effect and teaches him to recognize Allah as the real, powerful sustainer. Absence of prosperity must not stand in the way of marriage; similarly the marriage should not be looked upon as a means to poverty. At times a man and woman, on unification in marriage earn such blessings of Allah that they begin to wonder at their fortunes.

 

Nature of Divine chastisement for the unchaste persons

 

On the great Night of Ascension (Laylatul Mi’raaj) the Holy Prophet Sallallahu alaihi wasallam was made to see with his eyes the specimens of Divine punishment meted out to different categories of sinners for their respective sins.

He saw an oven full of blazing fire from which loud sounds of cries and shrieks, weeping and sobbing were being heard. Being surprised at this extra-ordinary phenomenon, he peeped into the fiery oven and was stunned to find it full of naked men and women whose lower bodies were filled with flames. The rising flames had created a kind of fiery tempest which caused the naked men and women to raise loud shrieks and cries.

 

In another Hadeeth the bodies of these people were raised all the way to the top of the oven, which was cone shaped, until they reached the exit and the flames subsided which caused them to drop to the bottom again.

He Sallallahu alaihi wasallam asked the controller: “Who are these people?”

He was informed: “They are all unchaste men and women who were in the habit of committing fornication and adultery in their worldly life.”

Importance of marriage and its stability:

 

Whereas Islam has made it a father’s responsibility to arrange, timely marriage of his son or daughter, the son or the daughter are also required to understand its importance and not to oppose any such proposal made by the father. It is the father’s responsibility to make a suitable selection of a match for his son or daughter. Among other things he should have his eyes on the moral and religious sectors of prospective candidates. A boy or a girl with good religious background is expected to prove loyal and such a marriage may be stable and without troubles. Allah has forbidden marriage of Muslim males with polytheistic females:

“Do not marry the polytheist until they have embraced Islam and become faithful.”

The Muslim scholars have explained in detail the importance of this embargo as laid down by Allah in the Holy Qur’an.Shaikh ul Hind. Maulana Mahmood ul Hassan Rahmatullah alaih writes: “Marriage is such an institution that a man and a woman get most close and near to each other. Their mutual love, their actions and speech, everything has an effect on the other party. If the wife or the husband is a non-Muslim polytheist, the effects of evil belief are bound to fall on the Muslim wife or husband who upholds monotheism. A prolonged association with a person of evil faith may’ change the heart of the other party and may land him in the Fire of Hell. As such, such marriage must be eschewed.” Shah Wali ullah Rahmatullah alaih of Delhi has also expressed similar views.

Apart from moral and religious draw-backs of marriage with non-Muslims, even from worldly point of view, the chances: of such a marriage being successful are rare. When thinking is not alike, faith and belief is not alike, married life cannot give love and loyalty to the parties and there can be chances of frequent bitterness and temperamental differences. There are fears of modesty of the two sides, being affected. As such, no Muslim should think of marrying a non-Muslim.

 

 

The system of Modesty & Chastity in Islam

 

Marriage (Photo credit: Lel4nd)

 

Jamiat gauteng

 

Seeing the woman before marriage

 

Islam has permitted that a prospective bachelor may catch sight of his fiancee before the marriage is consummated. This is conducive to the protection of modesty. The Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said: “Whenever anyone among you (Muslims) proposes marriage with a woman, he should, if possible, catch sight of her.”

 

Seeing the person is foil of many advantages. It will if the woman is liked, confirm the intention of marriage. It will obviate all chances of criticism of defects, if any, after the marriage. To obtain relevant details about the proposed match is necessary.

 

The Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wasallam) advised Hazrat Moghira bin Shu’ba Radiallahu anhu to catch a sight of the lady he had intended to marry because that would be helpful in connecting mutual relations. According to Imam Tirmzi Rahmatullah alaih, sighting of a fiancee would be conducive to mutual love and regard during the married life.

 

According to Hazrat Abu Horairah Radiallahu anhu, the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wasallam) commanded a man to see his proposed bride (who was an Ansaria) and uttered the following words: “Go and see the woman because in the eyes of the Ansar women there is some thing you may not like.” According to Imam Nawawi Rahmatullah alaih, catching a glimpse of the fiancee is advisable. This view is showed by Imam Abu Hanifa, Imam Malik and Imam Ahmed.

 

As a matter of fact, the seeing should preferably be done without notice and without knowledge of the concerned woman, if possible. If personal sighting is not possible, it may be done by a reliable woman who may report pros and cons of the woman.

 

Two of the organs, face, and hands may be seen with advantage. These two organs are beyond the Islamic ‘satar’ (fit to be hidden), the face will reveal the beauty and graces and the hands and arms will reveal the standard of physical health and bodily structure.

 

As against this useful contrivance made permissible in Islam, the western and the non-Muslim usage of court­ship is highly objectionable and fraught with moral dangers. This situation is highly objectionable from Islamic viewpoint and it defeats the very purpose of marriage in Islam, which seeks, to protect the modesty and chastity of a female. Before the consummation of marriage a male and a female are strangers to each other and are not allowed even to sit closely together and enter into conversation and discussion. The sighting of a would – be bride has been allowed only as a precaution to obviate chances of criticism by the man about any defects which may become known after the marriage.

 

Allama Rashid Raza, an Egyptian scholar wrote: “For the last 30 or 40 years I have carried out research on the marital relations between men and women. I have read carefully a lot of literature on this subject and have writtenmany pages in my commentary “Al-Minar.” But I firmly disbelieve when thinkers both in east and west opine that satisfactory marital life and the pleasure attendant on it depend on the pre-marriage acquaintance of a male and a female and on the mutual love developed in the course of their courtship.”

 

The courtship formula has proved to be ineffective and harmful because initial love is gradually diminished after marriage and, as the Arabian proverb goes: marriage puts an end to the love, which a man and a woman may have before marriage. Sentiments subside when hard realities of life are faced by both man and woman.

 

The correct attitude which requires to be adopted was taught by Hazrat Umar Radiallahu anhu when an outspoken woman told him (as head of the State): ^،I have no natural love for him.” She was wisely advised: “When a woman does not have natural love for her husband, she should not tell him, because sentimental and heart to heart love is rare. Let married couples live in accordance with the teachings of Islam and have mutual regard and respect within the Divine injunctions. Let them discharge the obligations develoving on each and have regard for the mutual rights as fixed by Islam: He added: “Man and wife would be well-advised to express more love for each other than they actually feel. That way their amicable relations will improve with the passage of time and their family life would become happy and satisfactory.”

 

Marriage Proposal in Islam

Hassan Sulaiman	Jul 27
to me

Advice to women regarding marriage – II
Posted byadministrator on Friday, February 22 @ 22:34:07 AST
Contributed by administrator
Hassan Sulaiman
Jul 27

to me
Advice to women regarding marriage – II
Posted byadministrator on Friday, February 22 @ 22:34:07 AST
Contributed by administrator

What to do upon receiving a proposal:

The young woman should pray Istikhaarah (i.e., the Prayer of Guidance) and not to ask others to pray it on her behalf, as some women do, as this is a baseless act and an innovation in the religion. Furthermore, she should seek the advice of trustworthy people and inquire about the person.

Imaam Ahmad (may Allah have mercy on him) reported the story of Julaybeeb (may Allah be pleased with him) who was sent by the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) to one of the families of the Ansaar (i.e., the residents of Madeenah) to give him their daughter in marriage. Julaybeeb (may Allah be pleased with him) was very impoverished and so the young woman’s mother reused the offer, but the young woman spoke out and agreed to marry him because he was sent to her by the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) himself. The result was that she never suffered in any way, and that there was no other woman of the Ansaar who was wealthier than her. This is because Julaybeeb (may Allah be pleased with him) was killed in the very next battle that occurred after his marriage, having killed seven disbelievers in it. Upon finding his body, the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) carried him and buried him with his own hands. He (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) also supplicated for the widow, saying: “O Allaah! Pour Your blessings upon her and do not make her suffer in life.” It was due to this supplication that she never suffered, in any way, and that there was no woman from the Ansaar wealthier than her.

If the man proposing wishes that his future wife give up her studies or job after marriage, and he is a suitable man, then this should not hamper the marriage. Also, if the man finds such a young woman to be a suitable one, he should not reconsider marrying her due to this, as he could marry her and then convince her after marriage to give it up.

Similarly, the family and the young woman should not refuse a proposal from a man due to him having children from a previous marriage.

Some young women overlook certain matters, such as the man’s looks and wealth, only to have misgivings and regret their decision later. Therefore, the young woman should be absolutely sure before giving her approval and be honest with herself when she makes her decision. Moreover, she should be content with him based on religious convictions. Some women always advise their friends regarding the matter of being a second wife, stating that it is an integral part of Islaam and that they should not refuse a man simply because he is already married; however, when they themselves get married as second wives, they act very differently to the advice they gave others, due to their covetousness.

The young woman should be a facilitating factor in her marriage; she should, for example, refuse to set unbearable conditions or a high dowry, but if her family insists, then she should nominally agree and then relieve her husband of such difficulties later on.

Some women behave arrogantly towards their husbands due to holding advanced degrees, having a noble lineage, the wealth of their families, or their beauty. The result of this arrogance is that they act rebelliously towards their husbands and thus acquire sin.

Fears of some young women in the process of marriage:

Some young women fear the imminent loss of their close friends and sisters due to their impending marriage. This may cause them to hate the future husband, perhaps causing them, prior to the wedding night, to go as far as to seek to annul the marriage contract.

This could happen for many reasons, such as:

· Improperly assessing the consequences of such actions.

· Having an irresponsible and reckless attitude.

· Favouring the joy of the short term over the long term one of having children and the establishment of a happy marital life.

Also, the husband should not deprive his wife of her female friends and relatives. The Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) would allow the female friends of ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) to visit her.

When a young woman is being proposed to, she should educate herself about the rulings of marriage, the rights of the husband, the rights of the wife, and how to live in kindness and harmony with her spouse. On the other hand, she should not concern herself with studying the sexual aspects of marital life until the marriage contract is completed.

The wife’s role in her home:

This is to serve her husband, bear, nurse, and nurture his children, and be a housewife.

If a woman is used to being immersed in the study and propagation of Islaam, and then marries whilst not clearly having in mind a role as a wife, she may begin feeling, very shortly after marriage, that her new role as a wife is a trivial one. This may cause her to begin leaving her house to resume her former lifestyle. It is vital, however, that she understand her role and obligation as a wife and the reward of fulfilling them. Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “If a woman prays her five daily prayers, fasts her month (i.e. the month of Ramadhaan), guards her private parts and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any of its gates that she wishes.” [Abu Nu’aym]

The married woman must persevere through the hardships of pregnancy, pre-delivery contractions and the agony of the delivery itself. Some women refuse to go through such hardships and take birth control pills to prevent pregnancy, or, if they do get pregnant, prefer a caesarean section over a normal delivery.

‘Amr Ibn Hijr (may Allah have mercy on him) married Kindah Bint ‘Awf Ash-Shaybaani (may Allah have mercy on him). On her wedding night, her mother, Umaamah Bint Al-Haarith (may Allah be pleased with her) took her aside and advised her: “Dear daughter! You are leaving the environment which you are accustomed to and departing from the place you grew up in to a partner whom you are unfamiliar with. If a woman had no need of a husband due to her parents sufficing her, then you would be the last person to require a husband, but women were created to be the partners of men, and men were created to be the partners of women. Act like his slave, and he will become like your slave. Uphold the following ten matters and you will find them to be provisions: The first and second are to be content with what he provides and to listen to and obey him. The third and the fourth are to make sure that all he sees and smells from you are pleasing to him, so he should not see you in a displeasing appearance, nor smell anything but a fine fragrance from you. The fifth and the sixth are to comfort him in his sleep and food, because repeated hunger and lack of sleep will enflame his anger. The seventh and the eighth are to protect his wealth and take care of his children; the focal point regarding wealth is to have good judgement in spending it, and that regarding the children is to properly nurture them. The ninth and the tenth are to not disobey his commands or disclose his secrets, because when you disobey him you intimidate him, and if you disclose his secrets you would not know what he may do to you. Do not be joyful in front of him when he is upset, or express sadness if he is happy.”

‘Abdullaah Ibn Ja’far (may Allah have mercy on him) addressed his daughter saying: “Avoid jealousy, as it is the key to your divorce; avoid complaint, as it instigates anger; adorn yourself for him, and make sure you wash away any bad odours by frequent bathing.”

Pre-marital errors on the part of women:

· Freely talking to males on the telephone and being open with male relatives.

· Being over confident and rejecting many of those who propose.

· Not differentiating between wisdom and fast rejection.

· Not having the criterion by which to judge the proposing person clearly in mind.

Finally, many young women wish to get married but they waste their time daydreaming and wishfully thinking about the ideal husband. This is all fruitless; the best way for them to attain a good husband would be to busy themselves in supplicating to Allaah to provide such a person.

http://www.islamweb.net
What to do upon receiving a proposal: 

The young woman should pray Istikhaarah (i.e., the Prayer of Guidance) and not to ask others to pray it on her behalf, as some women do, as this is a baseless act and an innovation in the religion. Furthermore, she should seek the advice of trustworthy people and inquire about the person.

Imaam Ahmad (may Allah have mercy on him) reported the story of Julaybeeb (may Allah be pleased with him) who was sent by the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) to one of the families of the Ansaar (i.e., the residents of Madeenah) to give him their daughter in marriage. Julaybeeb (may Allah be pleased with him) was very impoverished and so the young woman’s mother reused the offer, but the young woman spoke out and agreed to marry him because he was sent to her by the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) himself. The result was that she never suffered in any way, and that there was no other woman of the Ansaar who was wealthier than her. This is because Julaybeeb (may Allah be pleased with him) was killed in the very next battle that occurred after his marriage, having killed seven disbelievers in it. Upon finding his body, the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) carried him and buried him with his own hands. He (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) also supplicated for the widow, saying: “O Allaah! Pour Your blessings upon her and do not make her suffer in life.” It was due to this supplication that she never suffered, in any way, and that there was no woman from the Ansaar wealthier than her.

If the man proposing wishes that his future wife give up her studies or job after marriage, and he is a suitable man, then this should not hamper the marriage. Also, if the man finds such a young woman to be a suitable one, he should not reconsider marrying her due to this, as he could marry her and then convince her after marriage to give it up.

Similarly, the family and the young woman should not refuse a proposal from a man due to him having children from a previous marriage.

Some young women overlook certain matters, such as the man’s looks and wealth, only to have misgivings and regret their decision later. Therefore, the young woman should be absolutely sure before giving her approval and be honest with herself when she makes her decision. Moreover, she should be content with him based on religious convictions. Some women always advise their friends regarding the matter of being a second wife, stating that it is an integral part of Islaam and that they should not refuse a man simply because he is already married; however, when they themselves get married as second wives, they act very differently to the advice they gave others, due to their covetousness.

The young woman should be a facilitating factor in her marriage; she should, for example, refuse to set unbearable conditions or a high dowry, but if her family insists, then she should nominally agree and then relieve her husband of such difficulties later on.

Some women behave arrogantly towards their husbands due to holding advanced degrees, having a noble lineage, the wealth of their families, or their beauty. The result of this arrogance is that they act rebelliously towards their husbands and thus acquire sin.

Fears of some young women in the process of marriage: 

Some young women fear the imminent loss of their close friends and sisters due to their impending marriage. This may cause them to hate the future husband, perhaps causing them, prior to the wedding night, to go as far as to seek to annul the marriage contract.

This could happen for many reasons, such as:

· Improperly assessing the consequences of such actions.

· Having an irresponsible and reckless attitude.

· Favouring the joy of the short term over the long term one of having children and the establishment of a happy marital life.

Also, the husband should not deprive his wife of her female friends and relatives. The Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) would allow the female friends of ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) to visit her.

When a young woman is being proposed to, she should educate herself about the rulings of marriage, the rights of the husband, the rights of the wife, and how to live in kindness and harmony with her spouse. On the other hand, she should not concern herself with studying the sexual aspects of marital life until the marriage contract is completed.

The wife’s role in her home: 

This is to serve her husband, bear, nurse, and nurture his children, and be a housewife.

If a woman is used to being immersed in the study and propagation of Islaam, and then marries whilst not clearly having in mind a role as a wife, she may begin feeling, very shortly after marriage, that her new role as a wife is a trivial one. This may cause her to begin leaving her house to resume her former lifestyle. It is vital, however, that she understand her role and obligation as a wife and the reward of fulfilling them. Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) said: “If a woman prays her five daily prayers, fasts her month (i.e. the month of Ramadhaan), guards her private parts and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any of its gates that she wishes.” [Abu Nu’aym]

The married woman must persevere through the hardships of pregnancy, pre-delivery contractions and the agony of the delivery itself. Some women refuse to go through such hardships and take birth control pills to prevent pregnancy, or, if they do get pregnant, prefer a caesarean section over a normal delivery.

‘Amr Ibn Hijr (may Allah have mercy on him) married Kindah Bint ‘Awf Ash-Shaybaani (may Allah have mercy on him). On her wedding night, her mother, Umaamah Bint Al-Haarith (may Allah be pleased with her) took her aside and advised her: “Dear daughter! You are leaving the environment which you are accustomed to and departing from the place you grew up in to a partner whom you are unfamiliar with. If a woman had no need of a husband due to her parents sufficing her, then you would be the last person to require a husband, but women were created to be the partners of men, and men were created to be the partners of women. Act like his slave, and he will become like your slave. Uphold the following ten matters and you will find them to be provisions: The first and second are to be content with what he provides and to listen to and obey him. The third and the fourth are to make sure that all he sees and smells from you are pleasing to him, so he should not see you in a displeasing appearance, nor smell anything but a fine fragrance from you. The fifth and the sixth are to comfort him in his sleep and food, because repeated hunger and lack of sleep will enflame his anger. The seventh and the eighth are to protect his wealth and take care of his children; the focal point regarding wealth is to have good judgement in spending it, and that regarding the children is to properly nurture them. The ninth and the tenth are to not disobey his commands or disclose his secrets, because when you disobey him you intimidate him, and if you disclose his secrets you would not know what he may do to you. Do not be joyful in front of him when he is upset, or express sadness if he is happy.”

‘Abdullaah Ibn Ja’far (may Allah have mercy on him) addressed his daughter saying: “Avoid jealousy, as it is the key to your divorce; avoid complaint, as it instigates anger; adorn yourself for him, and make sure you wash away any bad odours by frequent bathing.”

Pre-marital errors on the part of women: 

· Freely talking to males on the telephone and being open with male relatives.

· Being over confident and rejecting many of those who propose.

· Not differentiating between wisdom and fast rejection.

· Not having the criterion by which to judge the proposing person clearly in mind.

Finally, many young women wish to get married but they waste their time daydreaming and wishfully thinking about the ideal husband. This is all fruitless; the best way for them to attain a good husband would be to busy themselves in supplicating to Allaah to provide such a person.

www.islamweb.net

 

Hijaab from step parents and in laws

HIJAAB FOR IN-LAWS AND THE DANGER OF RECKLESS MINGLING

Question: After the death of my father, my husband’s father married my mother. He is therefore, both my father-in-law and stepfather. One day, whilst I was alone in the room, he entered and engaged me in conversation. Then suddenly he grabbed and hugged me. He tried having sex with me. I harshly admonished him and tried my best to physically ward him off. After screaming at him, he withdrew and went to take ghusl. He had groped me very immorally. Now what is the Shariah’s command for us?

ANSWER: When people ignore or scorn the Shariah, then they becomes entrapped in the snares which shaitaan and the nafs prepare for them. The Fuqaha have fourteen centuries ago warned that it is incumbent for a man to maintain a distance from his daughter-in-law and vice versa. The Shariah orders a degree of hijaab for them, and also for a man and his stepmother, and vice versa, and for a man and his stepdaughter, and vice versa.

Whilst these kinds of relatives are mahram of a kind, the fitnah of sexual lust is ever present. If the man had not married the woman who is his wife, it would have been permissible for him to marry her mother. This clearly confirms the presence of the fitnah of lust which is kindled when hijaab is relaxed – when they become too friendly and when they are alone.

Now see what has happened in this case. It is about the worst disaster. Your Nikah has terminated, and never can you ever live with your ‘husband’ as man and wife. There is no way in which your relationship with your now ex-husband can be repaired. The damage is irreparable and perpetual.  In addition to your marriage having ended, the marriage of the devil (your father-in-law/stepfather) with your mother has also perpetually ended. Two marriages have been destroyed for life by the evil Satanism of a man who succumbed to the inordinate lust of his satanic nafs.

Now, regret is of no avail. When the shaitaan (your father-in-law) had perpetrated his villainous immorality, he was fully under the spell of Iblees. When the nafs overshadows the Aql, then a man is incapable of thinking. Imaam Ghazaali said that when a man is overcome with lust – especially filthy lust of this type – then 75% of his brain cells become inoperative. After he has destroyed himself, shaitaan steps aside. The man then comes to his senses, and shaitaan mocks at him while the unfortunate slave of the nafs shed tears. But then it is too late.

When we proclaim the Haqq of the Shariah – what the Fuqaha have ruled – and we say that a female may not travel alone with her father-in-law nor be alone with him, then some satanic ‘molvis’ disgorge considerable rubbish. Now let these moron ‘molvis’ unravel the rot in which these two woman and the devil are trapped.

If you and your mother, because of fear and shame for people, sweep the filth under the carpet and continue to live with your ex-husbands, then know that you will pass the rest of your days in an adulterous union, and the resultant offspring will be illegitimate. Be more concerned of the ultimate humiliation and punishment in the Aaakhirah.

What has happened to you, is happening on a large scale in the community all over the world. Almost total lack of fear for Allah Ta’ala coupled with ignorance of the Shariah induces people to conduct themselves recklessly and to plunge into immorality without any concern for the ensuing terrible consequences in this world and in the Hereafter. It is essential – Waajib – to exercise extreme caution for in-law relatives.

 

Custody of a nine month old child

Q: What does sharia say concerning custody of 9 month old baby girl in divorce. Also do the paternal grandparents have rights on the child?

A: The wife (after being divorced) will receive custody of the child provided she does not remarry. In the case of a boy she will receive custody till the age of seven and in the case of a girl till the age of nine. Thereafter the custody will go to the father. The father and the paternal grandparents will have the right to visit the child.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.

( تثبت للأم ) ( ولو ) كتابية أو مجوسية أو ( بعد الفرقة إلا أن تكون مرتدة ) فحتى تسلم لأنها تحبس ( أو فاجرة ) فجورا يضيع الولد به كزنا وغناء وسرقة ونياحة كما في البحر و النهر بحثا قال المصنف والذي يظهر العمل بإطلاقهم كما هو مذهب الشافعي أن الفاسقة بترك الصلاة لا حضانة لها وفي القنية الأم أحق بالولد ولو سيئة السيرة معروفة بالفجور ما لم يعقل ذلك ( أو غير مأمونة ) ( أو ) تكون ( أمة أو أم ولد أو مدبرة أو مكاتبة ولدت ذلك الولد قبل الكتابة ) لاشتغالهن بخدمة المولى لكن إن كان الولد رقيقا كن أحق به لأنه للمولى مجتبى ( أو متزوجة بغير محرم ) الصغير ( أو أبت أن تربيه مجانا و ) الحال أن ( الأب معسر والعمة تقبل ذلك ) أي تربيته مجانا ولا تمنعه عن الأم قيل للأم إما أن تمسكيه مجانا أو تدفعيه للعمة … ( ثم ) أي بعد الأم بأن ماتت أو لم تقبل أو أسقطت حقها أو تزوجت بأجنبي ( أم الأم ) وإن علت عند عدم أهلية القربى ( ثم أم الأب وإن علت ) بالشرط المذكور وأما أم أبي الأم فتؤخر عن أم الأب بل عن الخالة أيضا بحر ( ثم الأخت لأب وأم ثم لأم ) لأن هذا الحق لقرابة الأم ( ثم ) الأخت ( لأب ) ثم بنت الأخت لأبوين ثم لأم ثم لأب ( ثم الخالات كذلك ) أي لأبوين ثم لأم ثم الأب ثم بنت الأخت لأب ثم بنات الأخ ( ثم العمات كذلك ) ثم خالة الأم كذلك ثم خالة الأب كذلك ثم عمات الأمهات والآباء بهذا الترتيب ثم العصبات بترتيب الإرث فيقدم الأب ثم الجد ثم الأخ الشقيق ثم لأب ثم بنوه كذلك ثم العم ثم بنوه وإذا اجتمعوا فالأورع ثم الأسن اختيار  (الدر المختار 3/555-563)

Answered by:

Mufti Zakaria Makada

Checked & Approved:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

 

A real life story for all married Muslimah women!

This is the story of a well known Shaykh (HA) in UK.

Shaykh is very ill and bed ridden for many years. It was narrated to me by Shaykh (HA) and his wife themselves otherwise I don’t think many people know about their background.

Shaykh (HA) came to UK to complete his post graduate university education towards the end of 1960’s, while studying he got engaged to a young woman from a long line of distinguished Deobandi Ulamah & Madhaykh back home. Since it was anticipated that this girl will eventually move to UK parents ensured that she learned English and read as much material in English as possible.

Aunty (HA) told me that in the 1960’s there wasn’t a lot of Islamic English material available but her father wrote to Darul-ulooms all over India/Pakistan and subscribed to all English magazines to ensure that she read them and was fluent in English. Since her father was a leading Deobandi Shaykh he ensured that his daughter read nothing except for Deobandi material even for practising English.

She never left home and wore a Niqab but all efforts were made to ensure that she learned and practised as much as English as possible. She had no contact with men and had never taken her Niqab off in front of anyone.

Meanwhile back in UK, the Shaykh (HA) was like another typical university Youngman in UK he liked movies and going out but never drank or had relationships with other woman.

They married and she arrived in UK in Niqab. Straight after getting on the plane he asked her to remove her Niqab because they were heading to UK. She begged and cried but he would have none of it so she had no choice but to take her Niqab off in the plane, she begged not to have her Hijab removed so he let her wear a scarf as long as it was nice and colourful, presentable and professional.

After arriving in London a few weeks later the new James Bond movie Dr No came to the cinemas so he told his wife to go with him to the Cinema to watch it. This is a woman whose father never had a Radio in the house, she cried and cried but he had none of it so both went to the Cinema to watch Dr No.

Then he told her that she needs to brush up his English and the best way is to work!

Aunty (HA) told me that she was so ashamed of men looking at her face that after he slept she would put her Musallah down and cry to Allah (SWT) to deliver her from her ordeal and make Astaghfaar thousands of times.

Desperate for help she wrote to her father explaining in detail and asking for Mushwarah to apply for Khul because she couldn’t take the humiliation of bearing her face in public anymore. Her father wrote back that if he is praying 5 times daily (which he was) there are no grounds for Khul and although he is indulging in Fisq she should make dua, make Astaghfaar and give him Dawah with love and kindness to change him but if she did think that she needs to end the relationship then it’s her decision.

He was a kind husband in every other way so she decided to be patient and started part time work. In the meantime she consigned herself to obeying her husband, watched movies, walked around London (without Niqab, worked) but continued to make Astaghfaar and continued to give Dawah to her husband.

This lasted for a decade until he changed a little bit and grew his Beard a little longer. Kids came along so she used the excuse that she needs to look after the kids so quit her job, money was never the issue anyways.

Another few years past until Shaykhul-Hadeeth (Maulana) Zakariyya Kandhalwi (RA) came to UK and then Darul-uloom Bury was established and again slowly he began to change. He decided on a whim to go to Madina and visit Shaykhul-Hadeeth (Maulana) Zakariyya Kandhalwi (RA), although she just had a baby and they couldn’t afford it she still went but they never got a chance to Shaykhul-Hadeeth (Maulana) Zakariyya Kandhalwi (RA).

He changed some more. Two decades past and he now started to become regular in Tahajjud and his Adhkaar until Allah (SWT) blessed him so much that he surpassed many in the ranks of closeness to Allah (SWT).

So in the end Aunty told me that she went through unbearable pain, anguish and ordeal but eventually Allah (SWT) changed her husband upon the Sunnah to such an extent and accepted his Tawbah to such a degree that people praise him but nobody knows about the tears which shed in the long nights asking Allah (SWT) to change the heart of her husband for nearly 2 decades!

The evil morons of this Ummah-the matric girls of 2012

Whilst Nabi Salallaahu alahi  wasallam instructed the women to stay within the confines of their homes, girls of this Zamaanah (time) passed their matric exams like flying devils.

To put  the salt on the open wounds, they were interviewed, congratulated and encouraged to study further by the evil Devil Radios.

Principals of various schools were interviewed and congratulated. Girls’ names were mentioned who done exceptionally well.

All of this was done under the sacred name of Islaam. It should be well known to one and  all, girls who passed with Haraam distinctions, have actually passed their test which will allow them to proceed into the bowels of Jahannam.

They have in actual fact gained distinctions in their abode viz. Jahannam.

Every girl who passed is doomed for a terrible reckoning in The Hereafter.

Every girl who did well, did Shaitaan proud. Every girl who got a distinction, be it a ‘g’, degraded the value of Islaam and is permanently under the La’nat (curse) of Allah, His angels and every Nabi.
Shame on the girls who passed.

Theyhave actually failed their test in Hayaa’ (shame). They have failed their test in ‘Ittibaa-e-Nabi (obeying Nabi Salallaahu alahi wasallam), for the Hadith
clearly instructs women to be indoors.

They have failed in ‘Ittibaa-e-Quraan
(following the Quraan), for the Quraan directly instructs the wives of Nabi
Salallaahu alahi wasallam to stay indoors.

Who and what are todays’ women?
Better than the wives of Nabi Salallaahu alahi wasallam?

Don’t they deserve a severer instruction to stay in their homes?
Shame on every girl who passed her matric.

She has actually disrespected Allah and His messenger. She is under the La’nat of Allah and His messenger.

That girl who will further her studies, is guarding her abode in the deeper end of Jahannam.

She is demolishing the shame, respect and character of every Muslim women on the surface of earth.

She will be an ambassador in the demolishing of the Hayaa’ of every Muslimah.

She is disobeying her Rabb-Allah, His messenger and every Nabi.
She is doomed for Jahannam. She is not fit to be called a Muslim women.

She is imitating the Kuffaar Na-Paak women by gaining fruitless distinctions. She is sinful.

She is a Faasiqah and a Faajirah.

And she is a moron, dumb stupid and silly.
Shame on you, O Muslimah, for demolishing the branch of Hayaa’.

Shame on you, O Muslimah, for uprooting the tree of Purdah.

Shame on you, O Muslimah, for causing Islaam to be degraded.
Purdah and Hayaa’, the solid stems of Islaam, were violated in her quest for a stupid matric distinction.

In school, Purdah is an alien friend who is folded and packed away.

In school, Hayaa’ too, is an alien friend, who is not befriended. How can she have Taqwa?

 How can she serve Islaam? How can she do Deen Khidmat?

 No, never will Allah use such a Faasiqah to lead Islaam!

It should be well known, that it is Haraam for Muslim girls who passed their moronic matric year, to hand themselves over to the land of Zina-university.

No Muslim girl, whose Imaan is healthy, will ever be found in a university where every type of sin is apparent.

Those Muslimahs who are found there, their Imaan is very weak and
about to be destroyed.

Know well, O Muslimah, you are supposed to be in your home.

Not be a prostitute and allow yourself to mingle and rub shoulders with every Tom, Dick and Harry.

You not supposed to be braggart for passing your matric.

You supposed to be remorseful, for every young male, Muslim or Kaafir, will view your Purdah demanding name.

Every Muslimah who received a stupid “A”, actually received an “A” for Jahannam. She passed her Jahnnam test and will enter it when she reaches there. She will be dwelling in the fierce,blazing hot fire of Jahannam.

Her “A” will serve absolutely NO purpose to her.

 Her stupid-Jahannam deserving “A” or several distinctions-will be of NO help to her on The Day of Justice.

Nay, Allah will never ask you, O Sister, how many Haraam distinctions you receiver, Allah will ask you how much of His Deen did you strive for to learn.

But Islamic knowledge, unfortunately, is frowned upon. Islamic knowledge is put in the back pocket.

Islamic knowledge, which is the knowledge of the best books on the surface of this earth, the Quraan, is looked down at. It is a backward knowledge.

A Darul-Uloom is not worth to be enrolled in. you will suffer getting a job.

You will suffer in getting wealth. You won’t become wealthy. You won’t see
money.

Never, Wallaah, O Readers,

 ‘lmud-Deen (Islamic knowledge) is ‘Ilmul-Nabi (Nabi’s knowledge).

It is a Moulana that is looked for when you, O Our sister, was born.

It was a Moulana that recited the Azaan in you right ear, O Our sister.

It was a Moulana who recited the Takbeer in you left ear, O Our sister.

It was a Moulana who was asked as to the meaning of your name, O our sister.

It was a Moulana (perhaps) who suggested the best possible name for you, O Our sister.

It will be a Moulana who will be called to perform your Nikaah, O Our sister.

It will be a Moulana who will guide you in your married life, O Our sister.

It will be a Moulana who will advise you with your marital issues, O our sister.

It will be a Moulana who will be asked to make a Ta’weez when you are expecting.

 O Muslim sister, it will be a Moulana  who will play the role of a ‘judge’ between you and your husband when is a dispute, O Our sister.

It will be a Moulana to whom you and your husband will go for Hajj classes, O Our sister.

It will be a Moulana who will make Tahneeq> of your children, O Our sister.

It will be a Moulana whose advises you will follow, O Our sister.

And finally, it will be a Moulana who will perform your Janaazah
Salaah when you become a Marhoomah, O Our sister.

No engineer, lawyer, technician, charted accountant, doctor, specialist, Sargent, politician, official, mayor, professor, chairman or even a boss will be capable of doing the various sacred
duties mentioned above.

Why?

Their degrees doesn’t allow them to carry out ANY action WHATSOEVER of the hereafter.

Even if they received seven stupid distinctions, they will not be called to carry out the above duties.

They are not respected when it comes to do ANY of the above.

But that Moulana, who hardly studied till matric, way will be made, his shoes will be put straight and he will be respected at all times by the above mentioned personnel.

Therefore, O Sister, you are running into Shaitaans hole if you attend a Haraam, Zina filled university.

By you obtaining a degree, or passing your matric, you were crawling into Shaitaan’s den, attending a university will show how you are willing to be hooked on Shaitaan’s bait and flung into Jahannam.

O Muslim sister, perhaps no one told you about this, or you were never advised in this manner, therefore, listen at once and save yourself from Jahannam.

Nay, “they have ears yet they don’t listen (to the truth).”

Tell us, O Sister, is there no Zina taking place in the universities? Are young Muslim girls like you, who passed their matric yesterday, not expecting from a Haraam relation today?

Is the Muslims who attend universities Salaah up to date? Do they observe the Sacred Divine Law of Hijaab?

Not the Hijaab which every Mary and Jane observe today, but the true Hijaab which will bring one in close proximity to Allah?

Is there no Haraam intermingling taking place?

Are the classes for males and females completely separate (i.e. not a single male will be seen, heard or spoken to
and vice versa)? Are the lecturers Muslims with a pious background?
If you answer ‘yes’ to ALL of the above, will you prosper in you quest for knowledge. Then your Imaan will still remain intact.

Although your emerging from your home will be Haraam, however
you will not be involved in much (other) Haraam.

If you go further to study, you will ‘display’ you displeasure to Allah for creating you as a woman.

Because it is Fardh upon the males of this Ummat to be the bread winners of their homes.

It is the males who have the potential in the fields of study.

Allah have the ability of studying to the males.

The females, Allah gave them the potential to look after the affairs of the house.

She will cook, feed and take care of her children.

She will know why her child cries she will know when her child is hungry.

Allah gave all of this to the females of this Ummat.

Males don’t know why the child is crying.

Nor will they know when the child is hungry.

And most important, they will be left hungry, together with their children, if the wife doesn’t cook.

If the wife works, where will she get time to cook?

May Allah grant us all the Hidaayat to make ‘Amal on what was written, Aameen.

Was-Salaam  ZA Muslims

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THE ZA MUSLIMS TEAM

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Iddat for Women

Iddit for women

 

Q: What is the iddit for older woman?

 

A: In the case of talaaq, the ‘iddat of a women who experiences haidh is the passing of three haidh.

In the case of the husband passing away, the ‘iddat of a woman experiencing haidh will be four months and ten days .

This law applies in the case where the husband passes away on the first of the lunar month. If he passes away during the month (i.e. on the second day of the month or any time thereafter), the ‘iddat will be one hundred and thirty days.

If the wife is pregnant, the iddat will be upon the delivery of the child in both cases (talaaq or husband passing away).

The ‘iddat of a women who does not experience haidh (e.g. an old woman experiencing menopause) is the passing of three lunar months in the case of talaaq and four lunar months and ten days in the case where the husband passes away.

This law applies in the case where the husband passes away on the first of the lunar month. If he passes away during the month (i.e. on the second day of the month or any time thereafter), the ‘iddat will be ninety days in the case of talaaq and one hundred and thirty days in the case of the husband passing away.

And Allah Ta’ala knows best.

إذا وجبت العدة بالشهور في الطلاق والوفاة فإن اتفق ذلك في غرة الشهر اعتبرت الشهور بالأهلة وإن نقص العدد عن ثلاثين يوما وإن اتفق ذلك في خلاله فعند أبي حنيفة رحمه الله تعالى وإحدى الروايتين عن أبي يوسف رحمه الله تعالى يعتبر في ذلك عدد الأيام تسعون يوما في الطلاق وفي الوفاة يعتبر مائة وثلاثون يوما كذا في المحيط (الفتاوى الهندية 1/527)

والمطلقات يتربصن بأنفسهن ثلاثة قروء (سورة البقرة الآية 228)

(وهي في) حق (الحرة) … (تحيض لطلاق) ولو رجعيا (أوفسخ بجميع أسبابه … (بعد الدخول حقيقة أو حكما) … (ثلاث حيض كوامل) لعدم تجزي الحيضة(الدر المجتار 3/504-505)

(و ) العدة ( للموت أربعة أشهر ) بالأهلة لو في الغرة كما مر ( وعشرة ) من الأيام بشرط بقاء النكاح صحيحا إلى الموت ( مطلقا ) وطئت أو لا ولو صغيرة أو كتابية تحت مسلم ولو عبدا فلم يخرج عنها إلا الحامل (الدر المختار 3/510)

والعدة لمن لم تحض لصغر أو كبر أو بلغت بالسن ولم تحض ثلاثة أشهر كذا في النقاية (الفتاوى الهندية 1/526)

وعدة الحامل أن تضع حملها كذا في الكافي … وسواء كانت عن طلاق أو وفاة أو متاركة أو وطء بشبهة كذا في النهر الفائق (الفتاوى الهندية 1/528)

 

Answered by:

Mufti Zakaria Makada

Checked & Approved:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)